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Welcome to Manopause--one man's experience of mid-life changes and the wild and wacky world of ageing gracefully. Bring your cane and join me here every day for another dose of levity and linament.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

You're Manopausal Male, My Friends!


What is Manopause?

The manopausal male is not a species of baboon:
Though tufts of hair sprout from his ears
Long past his honeymoon. 

And where his hair should hairy be, his follicles are flaws:
He's just a version of his wife
While she's in menopause.

The older male is restless while his best years are behind:
But where he needs his wits the most
They've fled fresh from his mind.

He doesn't have one youthful sprig of confidence in tow:
For all the facts he once had learned
Are facts he doesn't know.

He once could run, and jump, and play in time's exuberance:
But since arthritis loved his knees
He hasn't seen them since.

The older male is married too.  His wife is packing heat:
But though the fans are turning fast
She still gets no relief.

He'd like to touch her once a year, each anniversary:
But doesn't have the courage for
A broken bone, or three.

And so he stays secluded, though he dreams of going out:
And every time he loves his wife
He's filled with dread and doubt.

A man in this predicament receives no tired applause:
He's just a guy who's found himself
Confined to manopause.



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